Shades of Blue
by Thingbe
Summary: A series of drabbles focused on Yuan and Forcystus. Varies from fluff to angst.
1. Gone

**To start off, yay! A drabble series! I've always wanted to do one of these!**

**Anyways, Yuarcy. As in, Yuan/Forcystus. Or Forcystus/Yuan, since I can't see either of them as a definitive 'top'. But yeah, this pairing was all princespeach's idea, mentioned in a conversation on Skype. At first I - like you probably are - was rather iffy about the whole thing, but I was convinced and it's just so cute! Not to mention fun to write. I'll stop now and move on to the disclaimer, or I'll rant too much.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own ToS.**

**---**

**_1: Gone_**

"You've been visiting less."

He froze for a second before continuing to run his hand through the other's short hair. "I've been busy."

"You're hiding something."

A sigh. "I have to."

"... Alright, fine. But promise you'll tell me one day."

He kissed the other's forehead. "I promise."

---

It was painful.

They didn't say anything about it in the transmission – why would they need to? They were completely ignorant of the type of relationship the seraph had with the Grand Cardinal. Not to mention the fact that what the group had done was more or less obvious, considering Forcystus would not have let them infiltrate his ranch without confronting them himself.

Perhaps they both had known in their hearts that it would happen. They never spoke of it, or even of Lloyd's idealistic troupe; maybe because they didn't want their little time together to be spent in premature mourning. Both wanted their unconventional 'relationship' to last as long as possible, but now his (_his_) Forcystus was... gone, leaving nothing but memories of the times they shared.

Yuan would have to bear through the pain of loss for now; he still had work to do, not to mention plans to make.

But no matter how hard he tried, nothing could dull the ache in his heart.

**---**

**Okay, by the way: updates for this will be random and irregular. Probably with a lot of time between, considering I have all this Zelloyd I want to write... Doesn't mean I'll drop it, though!**

**I really hope you like the pairing, and maybe you'll write some too!**

**Please review if you have any comments or suggestions!**


	2. Protective

**Yay, a second one! I like this one more than the first, actually. So I hope you will, too!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own ToS, but I DO own two things of nail polish that are the colours of Forcy and Yuan's hair!**

**---**

**_2: Protective_**

Life could sometimes be very, very cruel.

Yuan knew this well – after all, he had lived for a _long_ time. However, he never knew that life could truly stoop to _this_ level of cruelty.

He finally had enough time to visit Forcystus, which was a great thing for them both. In fact, they had just been about to start 'enjoying' their time alone together when life tangoed with fate and decided to play a sadistic joke on the two of them.

Pronyma showed up.

Initially she had gone for Yuan (she either didn't notice or ignored the sudden awkward atmosphere and the fact that both he and Forcystus looked slightly embarrassed). She changed her decision after he sent her a scathing glare that was cold even for him, and proceeded to throw herself on the other Grand Cardinal. He tried his best to get rid of her, but all efforts were futile. Now, he was left to hold a conversation with her while looking for a chance to escape. Yuan watched from the other side of the room, glowering.

"Oh, Forcystus, you have absolutely no idea how _dreadful_ it is spending time with Rodyle," the leader of the Grand Cardinals whined.

"I have some idea, but isn't that part of your job?" Forcystus replied, attempting to peel her off his cannon arm.

"Well yes, but I don't enjoy it one bit!" She pouted, tightening her grip.

Yuan continued glaring from the corner as the conversation carried on. He usually put up with Pronyma's flirting and overall clinginess, but he couldn't this time. Not when she was hanging off _his _Forcystus during some of his precious little time with the man.

"Pronyma," he said darkly. Both Grand Cardinals turned to look at him. "Don't you have some _work_ to do?" His voice was filled with malice, and even Forcystus was slightly frightened.

"L-Lord Yuan... Erm, yes, I... Um, I believe Lord Yggdrasill wished to speak with me..." Pronyma hurried out of the room, thoroughly startled by Yuan's sudden anger.

After he was sure the woman was finally gone, the blue-haired seraph relaxed and sighed. Forcystus gave him a look and asked, "What was _that_?"

Before answering, Yuan walked over and wrapped his arms around the Grand Cardinal. Burying his face in the other's neck, he said, "She was hanging off you. During _our_ time."

The turquoise-haired man chuckled, embracing his partner with his one good arm. "Don't worry. I'm all yours."

Yuan lifted his head and smirked at the other man. "Are you going to prove that to me?" Smirking back, Forcystus leaned in and their lips met.

Maybe sometimes life wasn't so bad after all.

**---**

**Yuarcy's so much fun... Anyway, I hope you enjoyed reading this one as much as I enjoyed writing it. I'll be able to write more soon, since my last exam's on Monday. For now I have to study... Bah.**

**Anyway, please review if you have any comments or suggestions!**


	3. Sleep

**Alright, this one's really short and has a story behind its inspiration! I was laying there at five in the flipping morning, and my cat wouldn't shut up so my mind of course went 'YUARCY DRABBLE ON SLEEP'. Yes. So, enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own ToS. My nails are now Yuarcy, though, and I bought turquoise Converse today!**

**---**

_**3: Sleep**_

It should be noted that Grand Cardinals like their sleep. Considering the fact that they have to run their own human ranches (except for Pronyma, but she never really did work anyway), this fact makes complete sense. The rule applied to all Grand Cardinals (with their own ranches), especially to Forcystus. He never had truly appreciated sleep for what it was until he got a taste of the responsibility that came with his position. All those who knew him knew the consequences of waking him up without there being something that needed his immediate attention.

He could find it in his heart to make one exception, though.

When it was late at night and he was just beginning to fall asleep, on the rare occasion where more weight would be added to the bed and warm arms would wrap around him, he didn't mind being woken up. No; he would turn and face the angel – _his_ angel – and return the embrace. They would usually go much farther than this, but sometimes they were content to lay there and enjoy their time together while it lasted.

Mornings after those nights, Forcystus would greet the day with – instead of his usual scowl – a small smile, and an air of complete contentment around him.

Because even if he ended up losing sleeping time, he always slept deeper with Yuan around.

**---**

**I like this one, though it's the shortest so far.**

**Leave a review to tell me what you think!**


	4. Thoughts

**Yes, another one. Drabbles are just too much fun to write! I tried making this one angsty, so we'll see.**

**Disclaimer: Any lawyer who spends their time sifting through millions of fanfics to find a disclaimer-less one has no life. ToS is not mine.**

**---**

_**4: Thoughts**_

Forcystus marched through the halls of his ranch, barking out orders left and right. He was heading toward the mana reactor, hopefully to stop the efforts of this group of so-called do-gooders. There were shouts from a few of his soldiers announcing the release of the prisoners before he entered the dark room.

This was all going to hell rather quickly.

Besides this group, there had been the team sent by the Renegades... That one had hurt. He knew that ultimately, he and Yuan had different goals and different plans that needed accomplishing, but he had always hoped it wouldn't end up like... well, like this. It was a fool's delusion, but there had always been a small part of him that wished for things to stay the same forever. That they could always just go about their days, their only real worry being when they could see each other next...

But... no. There was no way they could ever have something like that again. No matter if both still wanted their relationship to stay the same, it wouldn't work anymore. Not after all that had happened...

He wouldn't think about it for now. Forcystus pushed all those thoughts to the back of his mind and prepared himself for the coming battle.

There would be time to think about this later.

**---**

**Angst is fun to write... So, please leave a review to tell me what you think!**


	5. Hair

**And just when I thought I wouldn't get any inspiration today! I went on a ToS spree starting last night (woo 4 am!), so I killed Forcy (much sadness there), but I finally got Zelos to be my soulmate!!! Yeah, that made my LIFE. Anyway, on with the drabble!**

**Disclaimer: Yuan and Forcy aren't mine. I do own many hair brushes, however.**

**---**

_**5: Hair**_

Forcystus of the Five Desian Grand Cardinals had never thought he would have to face the evils of the weapon he was focusing his attention on, never mind that it would be the blue-haired angel threatening him with it. He looked up into the seraph's eyes, and said with full determination,

"You're not bringing that thing anywhere near me."

Yuan smirked and moved forward, cornering Forcystus where he sat in his chair.

"I'm brushing your hair whether you like it or not."

The Grand Cardinal realized he was trapped and glared. This made Yuan's smirk grow, and he continued speaking.

"Besides, it isn't that bad. I can't see why you don't want me to."

"... You tug too hard."

Forcystus continued glaring as Yuan rolled his eyes. There was nothing that could convince the Grand Cardinal to let that _evil_ hair brush near his head.

Suddenly, the seraph standing above him smirked wider and moved to whisper in his ear,

"I promise I'll make it up to you later."

That was all the convincing he needed.

**---**

**These are so entertaining... Yay Yuarcy!**

**Please review if you have an comments or suggestions!**


	6. Paperwork

**Alright! I got one posted today (my time)! Barely, too...**

**So, as Rin pointed out (and as I noticed), these mostly focus on Forcy. Kinda weird, but just how it ends up... I don't really like this one much, but anyway.**

**Disclaimer: I don't think 'When You Wish Upon A Star' applies to owning ToS.**

**---**

_**6: Paperwork**_

Paperwork, paperwork, paperwork... Forcystus grabbed another sheet off the infinite pile stacked ominously on his desk.

'_Paperwork that would be done if a certain someone didn't have me otherwise occupied...'_

There they were again. Those thoughts that just wouldn't leave him alone... those thoughts about the blue-haired seraph. He couldn't let himself think like that. It was distracting, and he still had so much paperwork to do...

Sighing, he returned his focus to the papers on his desk. This focus lasted a few minutes, until he slammed his pencil down and rested his forehead in his hand.

Those thoughts just wouldn't stop.

It was always hardest the day after Yuan's visits; he had learned that well by now. It got easier to stop thinking about the man as time passed, but that didn't make those stray returning thoughts any less painful. What made matters worse was that there were so many things that reminded him... like the paperwork he was supposed to be doing.

After deciding that no work was going to be done any time soon, Forcystus pushed his chair out from his desk and stood up. At the door, he looked back and shuddered at how much of the paperwork he would have to do tomorrow before turning the lights out.

'_... He's helping me work next time he visits.'_

**---**

**Hopefully tomorrow's will be better. Please review if you have any comments or suggestions!**


	7. Cause and Effect

**This is what you get when I can't sleep at 4 am and I decide to watch Back to the Future. Part III, by the way.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own ToS or Back to the Future, though there are no words to describe how happy I would be if I did.**

**---**

_**7: Cause and Effect**_

It was unavoidable, dwelling on the past. He did all the time; how could he not? There were the blatant reminders, there was the solitude... Yuan had thought he might end up like Mithos: caught up in an illusion and unable to see true reason, psychotic beyond all recognition of his previous self.

That was before he met Forcystus.

There was something about the Grand Cardinal that helped him forget. If only for a moment, forgetting about the abysmal state of things in the present (which were all effects of events caused in the past) was a true blessing. Being able to spend a day, a night, a fleeting moment in the presence of the other man eased his worries and allowed him much-needed time to forget his troubles and plaguing thoughts of the past.

And through it all, when he got to see the loving smile on Forcystus' face, Yuan thought that maybe the chain of cause and effect didn't have to continue, and his future would be bright if he decided to do something about it.

**---**

**Thank you Dr. Emmett Brown, for such deep wisdom. (And Christopher Lloyd for being such a good actor and having such an awesome last name.)**

**And wow, a more-than-one-word title! Amazing, eh?**

**Please review if you have any comments or suggestions!**


	8. Goodbyes

**Be warned: angst lies ahead. I blame Bon Jovi.**

**Disclaimer: Do you see an over-abundance of Zelos products? I think not. Therefore, I don't own ToS.**

**---**

_**8: Goodbyes**_

Leaving wasn't ever easy. As would be expected, it was the absolute worst part of each visit. Usually Yuan would leave while Forcystus was still asleep, thus avoiding having to say 'goodbye'. Sometimes, though, it was unavoidable; these times were even more heart-wrenching than having to leave in the middle of the night, knowing the other would wake up alone with all traces of the previous day's happiness gone. This time, though, a 'goodbye' was unavoidable.

"I'll come back as soon as I'm able to again."

They both knew it wasn't true; that he would never be able to visit anymore. Too many things were happening, too many things were being set in motion – things that no matter the outcome, they would never see each other again. Yuan thought that perhaps this was why they were clinging to each other, tighter now than ever before.

"I'll be waiting."

And wait he would – the knowledge that the Grand Cardinal was aware of the fact that he would be waiting forever pained Yuan deeply. None of this was right; they should have been allowed more time together...

They leaned in for a kiss. Their last kiss, Yuan reminded himself. It was slow, loving, and said everything they wanted to say to each other but couldn't find the words for. Oxygen should never have been a necessity for living, because it didn't last nearly as long as either would have liked. Pulling away, they looked at each other, the same emotions reflected on both their faces.

"Goodbye."

Yuan let go of Forcystus and turned, not wanting to see the other's expression.

Goodbyes were always hard, but he hadn't felt heartbreak like this in a long, long time.

**---**

**Darn you for having such good angst music, Bon Jovi!**

**Well, you should know the drill. Please review if you have any comments or suggestions!**


	9. Sunset

**This one's very description-heavy. I love description...**

**Disclaimer: I don't own ToS, but I did name my toaster oven Yuan. I lead a sad, sad life...**

**---**

_**9: Sunset**_

There was just something about the view from outside the ranch that was absolutely stunning.

Especially at sunset, when the reds and oranges would creep across the sky, covering the world in a blanket of fiery clouds. The very edges of the blanket unravelled and mingled with the darkening natural blue of the sky, creating a majestic purple. Eventually the dark blue would push away the royal hues of orange and night would arrive. The sun, always the gargantuan ball of fire, would be pushed over the edge of the trees, its daily grand finale through until its striking entrance the next morning.

Forcystus loved watching the sunset.

It pushed the busyness of the day into the darkness of the night, instilling a quiet over the world and bringing a hush that would hide any secret. The sunset brought a promise of security that the day couldn't hold, warming the heart of any after a long day of work and giving the allowance of rest at last.

Forcystus loved watching the sunset even more when he was with Yuan.

They would stand there together, neither saying a word to ruin nature's magnificent display of power. The safety, the promises the darkening sky held assured the two – of what, neither was sure. One thing was true – that the sunset made them feel eased, and though the secrets kept between them were not cause for the unrest that the day gave them. The sun of the day gave the world energy, life: the sunset relaxed them both, reassured them. He would look over to the seraph, to see the peaceful smile on the other's face, free of the day's stresses.

But what Forcystus loved the most about watching the sunset was seeing it reflected in Yuan's eyes.

**---**

**Alright, a notice: My imagination is running _dry_. So, if any of you have _any_ ideas _whatsoever_, please please please share them. I've been managing to scrape by for the last few days, but who knows how long I can keep it up. I want to keep updating every day (otherwise I'll get too lazy and never update), so please share any ideas you have in a review!**

**That being said, please leave a review with any comments or suggestions (or, now, ideas)!**


	10. Sick

**Whoa, number 10! Yay!**

**Yeah, I didn't update for a while, but I was sick... All better now, though! And hey, you got a drabble from it!**

**Disclaimer: ToS is not mine, and neither is the flu.**

**---**

_**10: Sick**_

"I'm not sick, I swear!"

Yuan rolled his eyes at the Grand Cardinal in front of him. The man was in bed; he'd been sneezing, coughing, running a fever – the works. And still, he insisted that he was perfectly healthy. He supposed he had to commend the man for his dedication – to him or to running the ranch, Yuan wasn't sure. He _was_ sure, however, that Forcystus needed his bed rest, and the sick man couldn't stop Yuan from forcing it on him if he had to (though that was a last resort).

"You're sick. Accept it, and get some sleep."

The turquoise-haired man looked up at him apologetically. "But..." He sighed. "I'm sorry. You never get to visit, and now I'm... sick." He admitted that he was sick rather grudgingly, Yuan mused.

"It's okay. I don't mind. Now, sleep." He smiled down softly at the other man.

"Alright... But, please stay with me?"

"Of course."

It didn't take long for the Grand Cardinal to fall asleep, lulled by the hand holding his and another running through his hair.

**---**

**I originally wrote this in Al Bhed, so the translation back to English wasn't fun. I managed, though. (Al Bhed, like in Final Fantasy X.)**

**Hope you enjoyed, and please leave a review if you have any suggestions/comments!**


	11. Cleaning

**This came about because my mom had the _fabulous_ idea of spring cleaning today (yeah, even though it's summer). I never knew cleaning could be so exhausting... Anyway.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own ToS.**

**---**

_**11: Cleaning**_

Spring cleaning was never Forcystus' strong suit, or cleaning at all for that matter. His desk was always covered in papers (as well as the floor on occasion), the trash bin seemed to always be full yet not to the point of overflowing, dust gathered in many of the unused corners in his bedroom... the list went on.

One way his desk would actually get cleared was when he or Yuan would sweep it off to use it for something a little more... _fun_ than paperwork.

After that, he had to clear the floor off; some (most) of those documents were important, after all.

The trash bin got knocked over sometimes by a stray underling walking in on them, who didn't notice the mess in their haste to escape (he should really consider moving that thing; cleaning the mess was annoying).

Yuan could probably see dust from a mile away, and it didn't stand a chance once he spotted some.

It seemed to be that he cleaned more than he thought, Forcystus now mused, looking around at his now spotless office.

(Which lasted until the next day, when the paperwork was once again piled high, the trash bin was again full, and somehow the dust sensed Yuan's disappearance and returned from wherever it had been hiding.)

**---**

**My mind is dead, so I don't know if this turned out very well...**

**Please review if you have any comments/suggestions!**


	12. Routine

**I'm not dead! Nor am I abandoning this fic! Life's just been life, and writer's block has been writer's block, but I finally broke out of it!! Yay!! Though, I wrote this from 3-5 this morning (proving my insanity), but I like it. It's the longest so far, too! I don't even know if it can be called a drabble!**

**This one was inspired by the amazing accident prone's suggestion of doing one on when they met. It started out like that, then somehow morphed into the entire revolution of their relationship... Thank you so much for the idea!**

**Disclaimer: Nothing mentioned in the drabble belongs to me. These are annoying...**

**---**

_**12: Routine**_

It was routine.

Just meeting the new Grand Cardinal, giving a first inspection of the ranch a month after their appointment to their new position to see if everything was working relatively smoothly, and to ensure that no serious issues would pop up. Maybe some intimidation techniques would be necessary, something like showing them the power of Cruxis and reminding them that defiance is far from wise. Forcystus was not quite what Yuan had been expecting when he made the (perfectly routine) trip out to Iselia. But then again, Yuan hadn't been expecting to be so drawn in by the man, either.

It was routine.

Every month after the first meeting, he would make the (still routine) checks on the ranch - make sure the new commander was comfortable in their role, that the common soldiers recognized the authority, that operations with the Exsphere manufacturing weren't hindered by the change in leadership... He couldn't help the fact that he _might_ have been staying for a little longer than necessary, that he and the Grand Cardinal _might_ have been spending a little too much time alone together, that they seemed to be talking less about the ranch (even while talking about it - they both caught on to the deeper meanings behind some of the things said between them).

It was routine.

The monthly visits ended after the first year, and changed into whenever 'Lord Yggdrasill' needed an update. The amount of time between these visits was erratic - it could be three months, it could be three weeks. Whichever was the case, Yuan would find his thoughts often straying to a certain turquoise-haired half-elf in these periods of in-between. He wasn't sure of when, but the (always just routine) inspections of the ranch were quickly being composed more of them being alone in the Grand Cardinal's office, rather than out on the grounds watching the progress being made. Casual touches here and there - a touch on the arm, a brush against the side in the halls, sometimes a bump of feet beneath the desk - had started, and slowly increased in frequency.

It was routine.

Yuan worked to make his visits at a more constant pace. Instead of the sporadic times that would be given to him, he settled on at least every two months - that is, if he wasn't otherwise occupied or unable to keep the pace up. There became more to the casual touches previously shared, as they began to linger longer and continued to happen more and more. They would often (even routinely) find themselves losing the trail of conversation, spending their time with their hands dangerously close together on the desk between them and getting lost in each other's eyes. It was during this period of time that they shared their first kiss. Yuan was leaving; Forcystus simply reached his one hand behind his head, leaned forward, and pressed their lips together. That was all there was to it - it was short and tentative, just a gentle touch that one wouldn't expect from a hardened Desian war hero. The shock didn't wear off until they were separated and Forcystus was walking down the hall back to his office. The seraph would have followed if he didn't know the true extent of Mithos' patience (or lack thereof).

It was routine.

Fate was undeniably and unbelievably cruel for making him wait that long. Of course, after returned from the unexpected first kiss, there was suddenly work for him to do all over the place, concerning Mithos and the Renegades both. It was another six months before routine fell back in once more, and he returned to Iselia. He didn't hesitate at all - walking in the Grand Cardinal's office, he quickly closed the door without taking his eyes off the half-elf rising out of his seat. A quick walk across the room brought him to Forcystus, whereupon he proceeded to pin the man against the nearest wall and kiss the sense out of him. There were no objections raised (if the hand in his hair was any indication), and this became part of the routine. He still couldn't remember exactly when it was they had crossed the line and became lovers (but he still remembered their first time in perfect detail), though that joined the routine as well.

It had always been, was, and would forever be a routine, and they would follow it for as long as they could cling to what they shared together.

**---**

**I probably won't be updating every day again. I don't know how I did it... Maybe if inspiration hits like a tsunami or something, so I guess we'll see. I'll be busy with summer school like I have been (decided to take next year's English course - more proof of my insanity), and that's for two more weeks... (There's H1N1 at summer school now! Party, party!)**

**I sincerely hope you enjoyed reading this, because I'm rather proud of it. Please leave a review with any comments or suggestions!**


	13. Time

**Yeah... I've been dead for, you know, months... Writer's block and other stuff's been going on. But! One of those other things is a totally-awesome absolutely amazing collab I've been writing with princespeach!! It's called Touché, posted on her account. It's under ToS/Naruto crossovers, but it crosses over with lots more... It's awesome! Go read it! Now!**

**Disclaimer: I never have and never will own Tales of Symphonia.**

**---**

_**13: Time**_

Seconds to minutes to hours to days to months to years...

It all became irrelevant when the remainder of one's life is immeasurable; eternity wasn't a quantity. A year might feel like a day, or a month might feel like a minute - days passed in the blink of an eye. Yuan rationalized that there was no point in keeping track of time when you had all you would ever need and more.

But then, Forcystus happened.

It was gradual, but it was there; Yuan could slowly but surely feel himself counting the minutes, the seconds he spent with the other man. Every moment was precious, and no time went to waste. Conversely, time between his visits seemed to drag longer. A day would feel like a year, or a minute like a month, and it pained him to know that were the situation different, they could be spending all this wasted time together.

And, however selfish it was, Yuan desperately wanted Forcystus to be a part of eternity.

**---**

**Sorry for such a long time between drabbles; I epic fail at updating, I know. It'd be easier if I had ideas (hint hint). So if you have any suggestions, I'm open to them. Doesn't even have to be a full-fledged idea - even a word, thought, feeling, etc. would suffice.**

**Thank you for reading, and please review!**


	14. Crash

**So... Firstly, I'm very, _very _sorry for the long wait! And I know I promised a couple of people I'd post one earlier, but y'know... Life... It does things. Things like finals and tests and labs... Not to mention all the laziness. One of these days (weeks, months...), I'll start some sort of a regular schedule! Sometime!**

**Anyway, I was on Wikipedia some time ago, and upon visiting Zelos' voice actor's page, I learned that he wrote and won an award for a play when he was sixteen. What was it called? _Shades of Blue_, of course!**

**Disclaimer: I am not in possession of Shiloh Strong, his play, or Tales of Symphonia - however, that doesn't mean I'd _object_ to owning any of them.**

**---**

_**14: Crash**_

One look at Yuan's face, and you might have thought the world was ending.

It was an otherwise normal day in the Tethe'alla Renegade base, with the usual scampering about of subordinates and other such things. It should have been boring, uneventful, and generally one more day to add to the long list.

That's what it _should_ have been.

But of course, the world was against him, and Yuan sat in the midst of the blue screens (it wasn't even a _good_ blue, dammit!) surrounding him in his private offices.

Somehow, some way, all of his private computer consoles had decided that _they didn't want to work anymore_. Which may not have been so bad on any other supposedly normal day - on _this_ supposedly normal day, however, he had just about finished the long and arduous task of setting up an invisible-to-outsiders communication link with a certain Grand Cardinal in a certain human ranch in Sylvarant.

It would have been wonderful, having such a line of communication; this thought passed through his mind over and over as each and every screen around him turned that annoying blue. He sighed in defeat and closed his eyes - his first movement in at least a few minutes. It was even beyond the point where he could be angry at all; the only thing he could do now was start over...

Or was it? He stood up quickly, smiling to himself from his _brilliant_ new idea. He had nothing pressing to do, nowhere to be, so it was a perfect plan - if he did say so himself.

Why bother trying so hard for remote communication when he had all the resources and time for an actual visit?

**---**

**Inspired by my own computer troubles. I got this pretty new VAIO laptop, and it was behaving fine until it started BSODing every day, resulting in many memory diagnostics (which told me there _is_ a problem, just not _what_). And today, it told me there's an error with the hard disk; I had to back everything up to a network drive and shut it down before everything was lost. So I go onto the network drive on my old laptop, and guess what? Every folder EXCEPT my writing folder was there. Just peachy, eh?**

**End rant. In short: my beautiful new computer has some sort of a death wish.**

**If you leave a review, it might just guilt me into writing these more.**


	15. Unknown

**I said a week or two, and look! A couple days! I've actually had this finished for a while, but I was unsure about posting it... Anyway, on with the drabble!**

**Disclaimer: ToS is not of my creation, but this pairing partially is.**

**---**

_**14: Unknown**_

What was he getting himself into?

Really, after being around as long as he had, he should know better.  
_This was dangerous territory he was entering, and he knew it; it didn't stop him, he was too headstrong._

He was an old man, really, and getting this involved with someone so much younger, so naïve in the ways of the world…  
_He was confident in himself and his beliefs, set in his ways - felt wise beyond his years._

Would it be that surprising if the other realized he was wasting away his youth with someone so _old_?  
_But then, could he be sure that he wouldn't get boring, his life surely being nothing more than a blip to the other?_

Sometimes he would wonder at how sad it was that someone so young had been through so much.  
_It was a little saddening, thinking about how lonely an indefinite existence would be._

How long could he keep them both safe?  
_How long would 'forever' last until circumstances forced them apart?_

But then, years upon years of existence had taught him how to appreciate good things while they happened.  
_Maybe, for once, he could just look on the positive side, and ignore his worries._

Maybe his worries were unfounded; after all, they could both manage a step into the unknown, and would last as long as they were together.

**---**

**Sorry if the formatting confused you at all; this one's a little on the crazy side...**

**Comments/constructive criticism is always highly appreciated!**


	16. Love

**Happy Yuarcy Day! Hahaha... Yeah, I've been kind of (really) dead for what, over a year now or something? Anyway, I've had this sitting around for months and I keep forgetting to post it but here I am! While it is not Yuarcy Day (June 18) in my time zone anymore, I am fairly certain that it still is for FanFiction. So it still counts, I swear.**

**Disclaimer: If I were a part of Namco Tales Studio the time it would take to make the games would make Valve look fast. From this you can assume that I do not, in fact, own any part of ToS.**

**x-x-x**

_**16: Love**_

There were a few words he didn't dare say.

Yuan even tried his hardest to avoid _thinking_ them, because for three little words (three syllables, eight letters), they certainly caused a lot of anguish. So he tried, as hard as he could. And he didn't think about them. They were definitely as far from his mind as they could be.

It wasn't easy, though, during his time with Forcystus. The look in the other man's eye spoke volumes and those words surfaced in Yuan's mind, tried and tried to escape. But they wouldn't, he wouldn't open his mouth and make a fool of himself – those words would stay where they were supposed to, locked up in the very back of his mind, away from where he would ever notice them.

He didn't panic, he told himself, when Forcystus started to say with determination and… that something in his gaze,

"Yuan, I… I think I-"

Nor was it panic that made him interrupt.

"I have to go."

It also wasn't fear that made him interrupt, that made him leave. He had a lot of work to do; lying to people you'd known for four thousand years was never an easy task. Forcystus did _not_ look hurt, and it definitely wasn't tearing his heart in two. Work was piling up, and it had to get done – that was all.

Every time afterward, when the conversation went _there_, he still didn't panic. He would change the topic quickly or just leave again, but that wasn't out of panic. So maybe he wasn't sure _what_ it was, but it was definitely not panic.

And after everything was said and done, the worlds reunited and everyone finally living in peace, he did not regret anything.

Not a thing at all.

**x-x-x**

**I realise now that I could maybe have written something a little more cheerful, but I was just sitting around really bored one day and this happened. Just be counting yourself lucky that you're getting anything at all.**

**If you have any comments, concerns, constructive criticism, cake, or maybe an idea/prompt for a drabble you would like to read, I like all of those things. Leave a review if you have any of them.**


	17. The Future

**Hello! It's been a while. But that's all good, because now I'm here with an update! A very special update! This drabble is indeed _very_ special because it is a guest drabble written by the one and only princespeach! Applause! Yes, it's all very exciting. So without further ado, allow me to present _Shades of Blue_'s very first guest drabble!**

**Disclaimer: I hold as much ownership over princespeach as I do the rights to ToS.**

**x-x-x**

_**17: (But We Have to Look to) The Future**_

On the ground, there was no marker. There was no sign pointing or giving any indication as to what had happened here. There didn't need to be. For Yuan, it was all feeling.

This was where he had buried him.

It had been a new experience for Yuan. Even Martel had been denied the tradition by her brother. To be honest, it was all a little ridiculous.

There was so much significance put into how the dead are treated. Digging a hole, covering them with dirt, and inevitably feeding them to all manner of pests. Next came forgetting about them, allowing grass to grow, all for people to walk about atop them.

Maybe it was a fitting description of people. To forgive, forget, and move the hell on.

It was alright, though, because none of that counted for Forcystus. No sir, grass would never grow here. Nothing grew on the ranches. Nothing even tried. The grounds were ghosts of twisted metal and mangled shapes of steel. The morphed creations of the fallen and disturbed hero. Where the rest of world would forget, this place never would. That was part of the reason why Yuan allowed Forcystus to stay here. Nothing else would ever happen here now. It all ended with Forcystus, and with Yuan. It also put Forcystus next to those he cared for most – his comrades. Yuan wanted that dedication to last even when it no longer existed. When nothing existed.

But even with all the noble intentions, this was still the place where Forcystus died. It would forever be the last real place they could never be together. When he came here, Yuan wanted to think of all the happy memories, but this wasn't that kind of place.

That was sort of the point.

**x-x-x**

"I told you that you wouldn't believe me."

"I guess I should have listened. I never would have thought 'Lord Yuan' was one for jokes, to be honest."

"I'm not."

The other gave Yuan a side-long glance. "So Lord Yggdrasil is the four _thousand_ year old hero from the Ancient Kharlan War. Why didn't I see it before?"

"Because," Yuan answered, ignoring the sarcasm. "You had no reason to. Think: there's no record of anyone coming before him. Cruxis itself is so old there's no exact date of establishment. It's an organisation that practically predates written history; why can't its leader be the same?"

"It's not that the records aren't there, Yuan. Lord Yggdrasil keeps them restricted. What I know about Cruxis is all that he _wants_ me to know. I would imagine it's the same for yourself. And if what you say is true and he is thousands of years old, then you have no way of verifying your ideas."

There was a short but thoughtful silence after the statement.

"What if I were to tell you that I was over four thousand years old as well?"

Then there was laughter. "I'd say you look good for your age."

**x-x-x**

Yuan had no preconceptions about what had happened. Forcystus' death was a direct result of Renegade entanglement. There were many things that he himself could have done about it, such as delayed it, or even prevented it, but in truth the real failure was his absence from the _place_. In an existence that lasted forever, Yuan would give a Grand Cardinal the most valuable thing he could, what they couldn't have then: commitment. It was why Yuan had to be here now and onwards, it was why the world was allowed to forget – because he never would.

It was why he wore black.

**x-x-x**

**Personally, I really love this drabble. I also love the idea that I can update this fic and I didn't actually have to do any work for it! How about that!**

**Also, princespeach has asked me to inform you of the fact that the title of this drabble is actually a quote from the recent remake of Battlestar Galactica.**

**Please let us know what you think of this guest appearance (and this series as a whole) in a review!**


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